HAPPIER POEMS

Following are some more of my poems. You'll find they're more cheerful than the previous.

ALONE

I have grown old 
and have become fat.
I now sleep alone
with only my cat.
____________________________________________________________________________

HOW

All my teeth are in a glass.
I've no more muscles in my ass.
My joints are stiff,
my hair is gray.
How the hell did I get this way?
_______________________________________________________________________________________-
ALBUQUERQUE

I had a gal in Albuquerque
She was pretty but mighty quirky
When we climbed up to Sandia Crest
'Twas there she let me touch her breast.
But alas, when we came down
she left me for a circus clown!
______________________________________________________________________________

LEXUS

There once was a farmer from Texas
who plowed the fields in his Lexus
The rows were straight
but the Lexus ain't
'cause the blades cut the Lexus to hecksus.

 ___________________________________________________________________________________________

 SEAFOOD

 I've had dungeness crab in San Francisco,
eaten sea scallops in Athens, Greece.
I've enjoyed lobster in New York
and clam chowder in Baltimore.
Had squid in its own ink in San Sebastian, Spain 
and oysters Bienville in Houston.
I ate delicious shrimp cocktail in Acapulco
and crab stuffed trout in Madrid.
Last but certainly not least,
there were the mountain oysters in Beeville, Texas.
So why would anyone think I would enjoy
"All you can eat seafood at Long John Silver's" 
__________________________________________________________________________________________
READING

 If in the bathroom you are going to read,
I recommend Shakespeare before or after you've peed.
Often there is "much ado about nothing"
And other times "if it were done when 'tis done,
then t'were well it were done quickly."
Whatever the case may be, there is much 
to be learned during a pee.
_______________________________________________________________________________

 That's all folks!




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